We were discharged from the hospital after spending two nights. Like I mentioned previously, we were able to stay at the hospital until around 3 or so because it was the middle of the week and there were not many new admissions to L&D. Also, the pediatrician, Dr. Hanzel, was a little late coming to discharge Bennett. No problem, sir. I was willing to take all the help we could get! Bear in mind, I also had no trouble taking all the free stuff I could get my hands on, since we were technically paying for it anyway. It wasn't like they were going to give the next gal an open bag of pads, anyway.
The first few days (read: weeks) at home are kind of a blur now. I was VERY sore from the tears and the attempts at breastfeeding. Thank goodness my mom was living with us for a while. She and Brian were so good at making sure that I took my medicine on time and that I was taking care of myself. I didn't get to lift anything! I barely got to make my own coffee. In hindsight - I shouldn't have complained. I know it will be doubly bad if we do this again since there will likely be a toddler who will be demanding attention!
The key things that I remember from those first weeks were:
1. I was either nursing or pumping every hour on the hour. I seemed to have low supply and was unable to change that no matter what I tried. My nipples cracked and bled and hurt like hell. We kept trying though, because Bennett seemed to figure out how to latch on and I knew that my milk was best for him. After two and a half weeks, though, we all gave me permission to stop. I would pump about a tablespoon each time (if I was lucky) and that was from both sides combined! We'd add that to the formula we made for him in the hopes that he'd at least get some of the nutrients I made in each feeding. Because he was growing like a weed and not losing any weight, we figured he was getting what he needed. What a relief it was to pack that pump away! I will certainly try again if the opportunity comes up, but I will also go into it with the knowledge that formula is not the worst thing I could do for my baby!
2. I do not heal quickly. Not at all. I had three or four 2nd degree tears and LOTS of stitches. I was bleeding for at least six weeks and in the first couple of days at home shed three golf ball sized clots. I am not easily grossed out by biological stuff . . . that not only grossed me out, but it scared me too. I had to show the first one to my mom because I wasn't sure what it was. Ick. Things still aren't 100% normal, but at least I"m relatively pain free now. I'd say that it took about 8.5 months for the majority of the pain to disappear. Next time I plan to do a couple of things differently. First, I've already purchased some cloth feminine pads and will use them for postpartum support rather than the disposable ones. Nothing like paper catching on stitches! Secondly - I will speak with my doctor more quickly about pain management. I waited until we had been in Buffalo for a couple of months before bringing it up.
3. It is not a good idea to move to a different state just after you've given birth. My mom and Brian would spend hours every day packing up our belongings because we moved to Buffalo when Bennett was five weeks old. It's actually rather serendipitous that Bennett arrived early because he would have been even younger for our move if he'd arrived on time. And i would have been in no shape for moving. As it was, I was not able to help with the packing other than to agree or disagree with choices being made by those two.
4. There was nothing more pleasant than having Bennett sleep on my chest. Many hours each day were spent in just such a position. We had a sleep positioner that we used between our pillows for him, but many times, I just had him sleep on my chest when I was in a semi-reclined position. Especially during the normal waking hours. He and I sat in the rocker or our club chairs just snuggling with each other. It was grand! He's still quite the snuggler and I'm so glad! It feels so good to have his little arms around my neck.
Up next: Winter in Buffalo, NY.
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